[worth]

In high school, I prepared a portfolio of my greatest accomplishments to take to college interviews, and I continued to add to it after my interviews, as letters arrived and scholarships were won. The portfolio is full of A+ papers, standardized test score reports, photography, creative writing, and award certificates. The proudest piece in this motley collection for me, however, is a rejection letter. From MIT.

I'm not sure what led me to include my Hopkins and MIT rejection letters to my portfolio of high school achievements, except that perhaps their very existence said something about me. Why did a student like me, who probably shouldn't have made it into College Park (but did), apply to a place like MIT? And why, instead of being crushed by this rejection, was I merely proud of the fact that I had applied?

The memory of the moment I added the rejection letter to my portfolio feels relevant in light of my recent loss in the SGA elections. I suppose the moment my opponent's name was called I felt a surge of disappointment, though I can't say that his victory was unexpected. The feeling that dominated that hour, and indeed the rest of the day, was the surge of pride I felt when I saw that I had received 950 votes. I don't feel like I lost. I feel like I won 950 times.

Time to move forward. I'm not sure where I place my self-worth, but I guess it's not in an election, because I still feel pretty good. I think I'm more disappointed that some of my peers think so poorly of me for events during the elections than that I lost. So maybe that answers that question in part.

I think much of it boils back down to love. I've gone weeks without an available food supply, might have to rid myself of many of my possessions at the end of the school year, and am spiraling into debt. I lost an election that caused my to fall about a month behind in all of my classes. Was it a waste of my time? Absolutely not.

950 people thought I was electable. And although far fewer think I am lovable, it is those few who think so that really matter. The post-election interactions I've had have given me a new appreciation for true friends.

Thank you for being there for me. Your genuine concern for me meant more than a hundred thousand votes.